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To Phuket bound travellers

This article is contributed by "poppit" and was posted on Sam's Delphi Forum Message Board . Visit my Delphi Forum for the latest info on Commercial Sex in Singapore and the South East Asian Region.


Patong Beach entertainment is highly "white man styled".

Patong

Soi Bangla (nickname "Soi Patpong" and its offshoot Soi crocodile) is full of "beer bars" with sexily dressed women and transvestites seeking to be taken back at relatively low prices e.g. 600 - 1500 Thai bahts for all night plus bar fine of 300-500 bahts. Some of these transvestites esp. those petite and cute ones with full transforming operation are more beautiful than women. Its hard to tell of they are or they aren`t.
At the Patong Beach Hotel adjoining the beach road, the Banana disco fills up with all the "leftovers" (people who have not hooked up by the end of the eveing) - beer bar women, strippers, ago go ladies and any other women seeking to be taken home for a fee. Most of these are the darker skinned types that appeal to the "ang mos". I am not saying that the dark skinned women are ugly - just that their style are more tuned towards the white men. Sometimes you get a gem. By the way, if you are "ang mo" (white) or "farang" as the Thais call foreign white men, Patong is a great place to hang out as many Thai women from the rural areas of Thailand (locally called upcountry places), do venture to work in Patong (or hangout) with a view that they are seeking a dream - yes, a white man lifepartner to take them out of poverty and a new life of "fortune and wealth". So if a woman gives you her heart and soul, take it but take it with care and knowledge that what you see is not what you always get.
In a more stylish way, the Safari club on the road to the Le Meridien hotel past the Transvestite Simon cabaret has the same type of clientele and lots of pick up women especially after 11 p.m. too and this goes on till the wee late hours. The music is great and if you fancy any women, just go up and say hi and if negotiations start, do your thing. Never once have I ever had a woman say no if I wanted her.
At both Banana and Safari, there are often the tourist men and women, whites, Japanese and all other sorts some of which are also looking for fun.
Japanese - if you speak Japanese, and buy them drinks and operate in pairs and you might get them. They are careful and most of the time under the control of the local guides who get the fucks really. And the Jap ladies want dark skinned men mostly somehow. Best way to get them is during breakfast in your hotel coffee shop and dinner when you can chat them up more easily - send them cocktails and they will toast you and say hi.
Asian styled women (commercial) and where to find them.
The best places are in Phuket town.
Top place is Pink Chamois Club at the basement of the Metropole hotel. Mamasan is Khun Oi and go there take a room and ask for her. When she arrives, tell her to send in the best women for viewing. They will come in, parade and you can pick the ones you like and if you don't like, ask her for more to choose. Be clear, polite and specific. Go at around 8pm before all the nice girls are gone. For me, she can even send a batch for choosing as early as 11 am to hotel but its a special relationship and I tip her very well. Always tip her well (when you first meet her) - 1000 bahts and she will serve you well and remember you forever.
Its a matter of luck. Sometimes she has great batches of new women from Bangkok and sometimes, you are at the end of the batch's season before the next batch comes. Often, you get students from Bangkok desperate for money working for a short season. I have had many who have since quit the scene and also many who cannot get out when they find the money so good.
An alternative place a little less good (still good) is owned by the same owner and is called the Pink Lady Club in a shophouse at AR Mini shopping complex on Montri Road - 2 levels of women. If any of you speak Thai, its better but if you go with driver or guide, you will always be charged more.
At Pink Chamois Club, the prices are from 2500 to 3500 for short time (3 hours) and for all night almost double that. (yes, its more expensive than Bangkok cos its a tourist resort).
But what we often do is pay for short time, and then, treat the girls well and tip her say 1200 bahts extra by private negotiations and she will stay all night more often than not.
Lower class places
At Phoonpon Plaza area, there are many areas and the biggest joint with more than 200 ladies is Joy's cafe/Karachi. His "all night" ladies should be 1200-2500 baths. If you go and are blinded by too many, you can say that it would be better if the ladies will stand and he will command his girls and they will all stand and you can have a good look at their poise and legs etc. Seated ladies are harder to view.
Along the main road of this area Soi Phoonpon, there is another smaller place on the main road which I cannot remember the name which has girls from 800 bahts all night up.
This smaller place is not bad.
In recent years, because of business and other reasons, my friends and I have tended to be focussed on Pink Chamois and Pink Lady.
Off the side roads off soi phoonphon, are many local broad houses catering to locals and the gals can be very cheap but its not worth saving this money cos its too cheap.
Thai style Cafes
In Phuket town, the two oldest and still the best Thai cafes where you have singing ladies in swimsuit styled costumes singing and sitting with clients for drinks (very cheap) are Bo Luang Cafe and Pink Lady Cafe (any tut tut) can bring you.
These ladies can sometimes be so beautiful and attractive and will sit with you. You have to "court them" so you need some time; but it all depends on whether you are a big spender. They all get a huge basic pay per month and then, they have to earn "flowers" from the clientele. If they do not get enough flowers, the huge basic is deducted off their pay (for not meeting target) and they end up with much less. So if you go and buy them lots of flowers, they "love you", but, they don't usually give you on the first night. Some hard to get women make you wait all season.
Also don't buy flowers unless you buy them at least 50 (500 bahts). Buying 5 flowers has no impact, so don't waste money.
And, ask the captain to tell the singer to seat with you before you buy flowers. Always buy her flowers when she is "out of turn" in singing on stage so that she short cuts other girls and the flowers will be presented when she is singing. Then, she will feel for you. Buying her flowers when she is singing "in turn" is wasting your money - no impact.
Remember, unless you are prepared to play big spender and already have some "rapport" when she sits at your table, don't waste your money. Our success with these singers have improved with experience, good local assistance from local friends and playing big time with the new singers seeking money and also attention. They will always try to drink soft drinks when they sit with you but entice them and make them drink in a nice way with you - alcohol. You can bring your own bottles of whisky with small cover charge 200-300 bahts or order there. They will drink whisky coke. You are charged for mixers and ice and that's how they make money. Don't be stingy if you want to succeed in Thai cafes. Anyway, its cheap compared to here. Thais prefer whisky and if you order brandy, it costs lots more and you stick out like sore thumb!
If you already have your own "bought out girls", you can ask them to bring you to these two cafes and check them out with the girls and you can ask the singers to sit with your group too while your girls are with you and learn relatively safely with your girls helping you along (they should be on your side if you treat them well.)
Learn while having good paid lady guides.
Thai Massage (the authentic real thing) - best in Phuket Town
Recommended are Madam (250 bahts for two hours)at Phuket Merlin where the masseurs are good and a mix between old and a few younger. The younger ones are not as good as the older ones but once in a while, there are a few exceptions.
The alternative traditional Thai massage Daeng Plaza Hotel in - same price as Madam has many young girls. The masseurs here as not as discipline nor as well trained. I have taken a few out and had a good fuck too and fuck therein too but the good fucks here are rare. There was once, I had this very cute girl who I went out with as I was her last customer and then we went out drinking and later fucking for two more days (I compensated her absence) and she turned out to be a kept girl of an older Japanese man. Sadly, my next visit, she went back to Kampong with her Japanese who bought her a house - all good things do sometimes end.
Sexy Soapy Massages
The price for Thais is 1200 bahts but for foreigners is for asians - 1500 bahts and for ang mors 1800-2000 bahts for 2 hours.
The best is at Christine at Patong Beach - back section of Patong Resort Hotel. They have really nice girls there if you go in the late afternoon say 4-5pm. Business is very good so don`t go say at 10pm. They close at 12midnight.
The only other place worth going is at the Grand Thavorn Hotel Massage parlour in Phuket town and the standard in my opinion is not as good as Christine.
Forget the one at the Pearl Hotel.
By the way, the singers at the Pearl Hotel coffee shop are older but sexy and very good poise. Thats because the rich and wealthy older men about town frequent this place and its a very traditional meeting place for these wealthy folks - old, fat whatever these men but the women treat them like gods. Unless you are wealthy and can speak good Thai, you have a hard time competing but if you look like Leonardo, its another matter.
Best drinking places in town with occasional pick ups but rare, (as these girls are workers usually with men or often nights off from their places of work) are:
Timber Rock where its intimate and fun. They have a good band Khun Kurt and friends and also, Sugar both in Phuket Town. Both are very late places too except for Monday / Sunday nights when its quieter. Best to go with your own women if its your first time but don't "lau kwee" (loose face) bring nice ones with you cos the people and women who hang out here are often fashionable and nice. In almost every place in Phuket outside of the 5-star hotels, you can bring your own bottles of whisky so bring them with you off the plane - 2 bottles each does not go a long way as its drunk up fast but then, either you are "IN" or you are "Out".
Most important is that you are polite to people and make friends and learn to be merry and fun and the locals will be nice to you too.
Most sex workers especially in the high class places are briefed and educated on Aids and will not do either blow jobs nor fuck without condoms and its good for your health so observe this and don't make her suffer mental anguish.
Thos seeking raw sex / BJ and swallowing of cum better stay in Singapore or go to KL - don't go pollute Thailand and your homelands anymore - they have enough aids victims.
Most Thais sex workers will not French kiss but the younger ones whose hearts you win will do so very passionately! Go win don't force.
Transportation
Best to hire jeeps and recommended is Pure Car Rent in Phuket town who will charge you 800-900 Thai bahts a day and he will deliver to your hotel as appointed. His jeeps are in good condition and well insured and he is responsible. There are cheaper alternatives but they often have poor quality and responsibility and insurance. The money is not worth saving.
Get a good map and unless you are a topo king, navigation is quite easy and drive slower and more carefully than if you are in Singapore. There is the alternative of hiring bikes - from small to large. All over the island, there are bikes for hire and recommended are Pure in Phuket town and Big Bike on Patong who have the monster bikes too. Do ride with care as there is a bike accident everyday on the island and fatalities are commonplace.
If you are useless in topo and cannot read maps and lousy driver, then take tut tuts around and you will end up with a tourist guide that you often do not want but treat him well. Well, often, you will find yourself charged commission wherever he takes you cos this is standard in their tourist culture whether its a massage, whorehouse, restaurant or shop.

Travel Arrangements
Something I missed out earlier.
Its always cheaper to buy air ticket with group package and hotel rooms too but the problem is that you end up wasting your time when they take you on shopping city tours like e.g. see city then cashew nut factory then goldsmith etc etc and by the time you get back, more than half your day is gone.
Hotels are cheaper through your tour agent who has contract rates with the hotels.
Frankly, this is my advice unless you gonna spend all your time on the beach.
Stay in town hotel rather than beach hotel and you save a lot in terms of hotel rates. However, true beach lovers will disagree and still want to stay on the beach.
Spend the money on a hired jeep and you can go to beach or anywhere as and when you want - 2 persons sharing is not that bad if jeep is 800 bahts a day and you free yourself from the leeches of guides and make your lady the hostess guide tackling problems of language when you go out to eat etc so you don't get screwed!
In town, I suggest the following hotels
1) Phuket Royal City - formerly Novotel but owners took back management 1200-1500 bahts with breakfast for two always book twin/double so you do not get charged what they call a joiner fee.
WHEN YOU CHECK IN TELL THE RECEPTIONIST THAT YOUR THAI GIRLFRIEND HAS NOT ARRIVED YET BUT SHE IS INCLUDED IN YOUR REGISTRATION TO CLEAR THIS UP WHEN YOU ARE THERE TO AOVID UNPLEASANTNESS IN THE LATER PARTS OF DAY ETC!
2) The Metropole Hotel - same rate as (1) above
3) Phuket Pavilion Hotel - this is great cos the elevator from the car park goes right up to the accommodation and you just park and go straight to your room - 850-1200 bahts with breakfast. (twin/double)
If you are travelling independently, I suggest buying as a small group your air tickets from Sunny in Beach road - they have good fares for Thailand either from Thai Inter or Silkair - ask them and tell them how many of you. If you go on Fridays, the fare is 30-50 dollars more per ticket so try to leave on Thursdays or other days except weekends Fridays / Saturdays.
Hotel Rooms - if you avoid major holiday weekends and other big holidays, hotels in Phuket city are not a problem and you can book also via Sunny Tours, Phya Travel or any others who do lots of Phuket tours and they can quote you a rate.
Nov - Feb is high season on Phuket so rates are higher for beach hotels than other times of the year 300-500 bahts a day more.
Otherwise, when you arrive, go to Sunshine Travel or phone them 076 3143975, fax: 076 318034 and ask them to quote for your needs b4 you go. Check these quotes against the agents in Singapore.
Recommended decent Hotels on Patong Beach (but not on the beach itself) are Phuket Royal Paradise, Patong Beach, Patong Resort which are just about under/over 2,000 bahts if u avoid the high season of Nov/Dec/Jan/Feb. (from Sunshine).
Seaview or issit Seagull Its a redeveloped nice property too with decent rates. Club Andaman is one of the better non branded properties but its pricier too.
At Patong, the only Hotel on the Beach is Phuket Cabana but you will expect to pay at least 800 bahts more than those above.
On Kata Beach, I recommend Kata Beach Resort which is right on the beach and you do get competitive rates - from Sunshine. Seaview rooms cost 350-500 bahts more and I would expect the rates would be close to 1500 - 2500 with breakfast - twins. A cheaper alternative in cottage style accommodation on a hill next to Kata Beach would be Marina Cottage.
On Karon Beach, Go for Phuket Arcadia but you are going to pay even more than Kata Beach Resort and you are not even on the beach so frankly, unless I am entertaining or desperate, I will not stay there. A moderately priced South Sea Resort is neatly located too at Karon area.
Of course if you are in big spending mood, the Le Meridien near Patong is very good but then I think its not worth spending that kind of money when you are going there fucking unless you are on honeymoon in which case I have even better suggestions!!!
If you are in Phuket to fuck the local broads, forget the Phuket Laguna complex or any hotel locate near the airport. You will find yourself shuffling an hour each way daily and trapped!
There are lots of other smaller type hotels etc but many of them do not work with tour agents so you end up paying the same and getting a smaller less good hotel so I think, stay away from these unless you know the owner or have some other reasons.
Best fax Sunshine and see what they quote you.
There are lots of other agents too but Sunshine is reliable, and very decent on pricing and service. They are also good on money exchange rates.
Food
In town - high class Chinese food is best at Laem Thong (between Ocean and Metropole which are the best fixed price department stores in town - same owner). There are another two other good (less poshy) Chinese restaurants in terms of aircon and food too - one very exotic dishes but I don't remember the name. You can ask Sunshine`s owner(s) / wife (who is Singaporean) when you are there.
The best hokkien soup noodles in town is opposite the Pink Lady Cafe - behind the Pearl Hotel - lunch only and they are grouchy but the taste is great. (small coffee shop) next to a jeans / western type shop.
They have another small shop in another part of the city but I will not bother to direct you there - run by the daughter.
The Phuket Merlin Coffee shop has good tasting Thai dishes lunch/ dinner too and the Metropole Hotel lunch buffet is very good value for money!!!!
At Patong Beach, eat at Bangla Seafood and say hi to the owner Khun Danai - tell him to recommend the specialities e.g. fried fish with chilly sauce - their Fried seafood Kway Teow is unique.
Lots of tourists get pointed to No4 in Patong and there of two of them but its better to go to Bangla Seafood.
The Chinese restaurant on top of the Royal Paradise Hotel at Patong is also good value for money if you are in spending mood. The Royal Paradise is far from the beach but its got great views because of its height (a tall city styled building).
Pure rent a Car is 076 211002 fax: 076 214220.
Fax and book b4 you go for the Suzuki aircon Jeep. (4-seater).
From the airport, you can ask Sunshine to arrange transfer when you book the hotel (chargeable 150 to Phuket town and 300 to hotel) or you can take taxi - and split between yourselves (cheaper) or you can take the Thai Inter Limousine Bus (small bus) to Phuket town - I remember that this is very reasonable per person too and they can drop you at the hotel.
There are no commissions earned here and basically, I am pointing you to honest traders who are reliable and give good service so if you have bad experience, email me when you get back.

Fishing (this is in response to a query on fishing)
Note that gamefishing is seasonal and there are two tournaments organised in Phuket by different groups. (one ang moh group and one local) as there is some rivalry there. Perhaps, these two years, they have merged.
There is a Phuket Gamefishing association and the president used to be Mr Prachantaboot (there is more than one). I forgot his first name and Thais call each other by the first name.
His younger brother Anand is the manager/owner of the Kan Eang 2 seafood restaurant. The family owns also the Kan Eang 1 restaurant both of which are in Chalong bay area. Both brothers are keen game fishermen. The family used to have the largest fleet of game fishing boats (wooden types) for tourists. Their rates are reasonable and they used to own the Phuket Cabana hotel at Patong until they had a very high offer from Malaysians that they could not refuse. I think you can contact them at Kan Eang 2 restaurant somehow. Tel: 076 216288 (hope this no. has not changed.) Before they sold the hotel, they used to have their own tour desk at the Phuket Cabana hotel (Aloha Tours) where you can arrange for their boats.
I have been told that their fishing guide used to find good catch for the people who charter but cannot testify for this first hand.
If you want to charter a luxury motor yacht just for fun and fucking, we have one which we keep but its not cheap! Its very private charter which we do for friends only but this is not a fishing boat its a luxury fucking boat. Email jatupon@samart.co.th about this "fucking boat"
I still think for fishermen, Kan Eang's owner is a good source.
Lastly, there is the owner of the Phuket fishing lodge (the lodge is for sale) but lots of visiting fishermen do hang out with the people there (its a small circle). 076 381223
Have a good holiday and stay smart, innovative and creative and bee polite and considerate. Good Luck, Play but stay Safe!

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